Save the NHS

Photographic Quiz.

Photo No. 245.

 

Question:- In the first couple of years of the 19th century, a half mile track was constructed, mainly for walking competitions. This was only about five miles from the first track constructed in Coventry (NO not the Butts Blog, despite what all these local Coventry historical wallahs might say!!!) What was the name of the first winner of the first race held there? And amazingly, over a hundred years later, the European Race Walking Cup was held over the same half mile loop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What was the name of winner of the first race of the day? And what was the country the walker represented?

 Dear Blog,

                Tell Mr Cameroon and his healthy minister that the following might explain why the NHS has no spare quids ................

                 I am having a two year anniversary bash and you and your partner Blog, are cordially invited. The theme of the party will be 'Doctors and Nurses'.

                 Why is this you ask Blog. That is a very good question, if I may say. Well it is two years ago given a day here or there, that I had my mega arse over tit experience. Two months sleeping in a chair then three months in bed with my head wedged, no problem. It was my Knee stupid. An unusable left wrist [still is]. It was my right Knee stupid. Swollen calf and foot. It was my Knee stupid.

                  And so it came to pass, that six months slipped by. It was no problem injecting myself for six months. I just love needles Blog, don't you? ;It was my Knee stupid. An no real inconveniences living off warfarin and bleeding away. It was my right Knee stupid.

                 The x-rays of leg ankle, back helped to pass the time .... Hmmmmmmmmmmm. Unusual result, but no further action needed. So what is all this 'unusual' business [lease, doctor man?? It was my bloody right Knee stupid.

                 And so it came to pass, that another six months slipped by. It was a problem trying to get dressed  without the use of certain limbs to facilitate the pulling and tugging required to look my usual elegant self. It actually was my right Knee stupid.

                And so it came to pass, that  a further  six months slipped by. It was no problem  listening to all the scary noises in the scanning machine. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. Lets set off with the spine. Dare I sugggest my right Knee???

               Shall we now waste further National Health money and scan your ankle??? Try the right Knee stupid! And the leg scan?? At least visiting different hospitals gave me an insight about how the National Health Service works in different parts of the country. The quality of the cups of tea vary so much ... and the price ... and the quantity. I do prefer china cup to a polystyrene mug, don't you Blog?

              Mr Cameroon says the National Health Service has pots and pots of money so we will use up a bit of it to scan your right knee.

              Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. We have another new specialist or two for you to see.

             Yes infarction  of the tibia and fibia. It was my right the Knee stupid.

             And after many moon rises, waxes and wanings, the surgeon shows me the scan of the remains of the tear of the medial ligament and the distorted bone growth of the bone which should be removed by surgery. Wot did I say two years ago????????????????? JUST WOT DID I SAY??????

            And the surgeons are impressed by my 18 inch leg scar and the scar where two of the bones in my right foot were extracted many moons ago and the scars of my half dozen abductor operations and the operation scar left after my medial ligament on my left leg was operated on .... which I cannot recall!!!!!!!!!!!! And they invite other doctors to havaluk.

           And the  new consultant was good, and he referred me to the Physio who is Brilliant with a capital 'B'.  And watch out Blog, because there could be a runner running somewhere near you soon.  Something that has  been missing in 2014 and 2015 apparently. Or so I am told. But I could be wrong. For my impeding birthday, I shall no longer use my trudges; I shall throw away my trudges and walk tall like a man and run like a gazelle. And the Lord saw that it was my right Knee.

            And with a bit of luck I will be a free agent sometime soon! And I shall give the NHS back to Mr Cameroon so he can help those that need help.

                                            Colin

P.S. Just how many quids in the last 24 months has the NHS wasted on me when a little listen to the experience of over 50 years of trudging on my right knee here and  there and everywhere would have given a solution in minutes and saved two years of a bloody lot of PAIN!

Don't moan, Colin, have an apple.

Photographic Quiz.

Photo No. 244.

 

Question:- What is so unusual about the photo of this particular Godiva runner and the photographer? And at his funeral, what didn't his relatives understand??

Dear Blog,

              So after my moans and groans in my last missive to you Blog, I promise that this letter to you will be a moan free posting.

               Proud to say that in the local Horticultural and Whatever Show about three weeks ago, I managed about half a dozen thirds, same number of seconds and ONE FIRST for my various fruit and vegetable entries!!!! So a big well done to me for all the careful attention and time and loving care I have lavished on my fruit and veg during the year.

BUT.

AND A BIG BUT.

              My only first was for my desert apples, that is, my eating apples to you Blog. Was I chuffed you ask me Blog. WAS I? Well I have to admit to you Blog, that I was given the apple tree from which the 5 apples were selected by a family friend because the tree was a nuisance and got in the way of her washing line. I dug the tree up about 4 years ago, not expecting it to survive the up- rooting!! Survive it did. Flourish it did. Win a prize it did. So I spend hours and hours on my produce and do sod all for the fruit tree. And what wins???????????? The sodding apple tree for which I made bugger all effort!

             I did offer the lady the certificate and the prize money, but she declined my kind offer! Story of my life --  a lady rejecting my offers!! Tell me about it, Blog.  Am I irresistible or am I irresistible to the opposite sex??? Tell me about it Blog.

          I do tend to criticise the local authority when I feel criticism is due so it is only right that I redress the balance when I feel the opposite is true. Such a case occurred over the weekend at Lake View Park when the Coventry  Parks Department (?) mounted an Apple Day. Most interesting .... and the important gentleman using a fruit press and promoting a display of many apples recognised me from the days of yore ... 40 years at least!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And the following day, just the opposite occurred.  Out 'running' (shuffling, trudging and so on and so forth to you Blog) on Sunday morning I saw a runner approaching me whom I have know for 40 odd years. I said 'hello' and asked after his health as you do in such circumstances, but was met with a grunt ... and that was it!!!!! Puzzling or what??? Was it because he was with a posh friend and preferred to not let on about the company he kept? Was it because I smelled????  Was it because I hadn't paid my council tax or was it simply a case of him being  bedazzled  by the sheer beauty of my stylish running?  It was a mile or so later that the penny suddenly dropped. For the last quarter of a century , he had got used to seeing me with a  face full of hair and a mouth full of teeth .... as of last week, my facial hair has been shorn and I now run without my false choppers in. Looking in the mirror when I got back to the changing rooms, I didn't recognise me so he had no bloody chance Blog.

        And a little more pluses for the Council. The previous week they mounted a public meeting on the Thursday evening at 5pm for an hour when everyone was struggling home from work, to explain what measurers they were being taken on traffic calming at the junction at the bottom of our Lane. Basically they are turning both my Lane and the on opposite lane, a cul de sac, into the preferential main routes and sticking a traffic island in the middle of the cross roads ... quite ingenious. They do not seem to understand, however, that we have 18 wheeled lorries delivering up the narrow country lane to the farms, the furniture factory and the animal food suppliers. It will be impossible for them to turn 270 degrees on the traffic island. But what do I know? The same situation arose when the council built the high concrete retaining barrier along the lane six months ago to stop erosion and flooding. I told them that the barriers would merely channel the water along the Lane and cause worse flooding in the winter, worse than we usually have. But what do I know?? I was wrong, however. The barriers have been in place for 6 months and they did channel the water and cause flooding worse than we usually have ... and it is only autumn and it was only after a single day of heavy rain. So Blog, I shall write to you by the first class postal system when the traffic island is destroyed by the heavy goods vehicles, given that it hasn't been  washed away by the flooding first!!!

                                                    Colin

P.S. OK Blog, I did not quite stick to my first terms of engagement. So there is no surprise there then!!!

 

Coventry Fun Run 2015

Picture Quiz:-
                     Go on Blog, guess who??? Nice picky what, courtesy of the Coventry Telegraph.

 

Dear Blog,

                 Long time, no moan ... so to counter balance that situation, pin back your lug holes mon ami. Je pence that is a bit of froggy stuff for 'mate' et 'I think', I think??? I could be wrong???

                 Just over a week ago, my daughter was entered to take part in the Coventry Fun Run, a three mile run around the city form the War Memorial Park to the War Memorial Park. She was to take part pushing my disable grandson in his wheelchair along with a dozen or so other pupils from his Special School. They were scheduled to start at 10am just outside the park on the tarmac, while the main Run was pencilled in to commence at 10:30 on the grass inside the Park.

                 Gets there in good time and get all the school numbers, but no official knew anything about the early start or the different start place!! Great!! After a great deal of fuss and the kiddies being kept in the cold shade of the early Sunday morning, it transpired that the start was to be 10:30 immediately before the main start. So 10:30 comes and goes, as does 10:31, 10:32 etc.. You get the picture Blog??

                 At about 10:41 or 2 or 3 .... sorry Blog, I was losing the will to live by then  ..... they set off. My daughter starts off with my grandson and fully expects the main field to start passing her soon, after all the two starts were on about 300 yards (metres to you Blog) apart. Did they get passed??? Oh no they didn't. No, not anywhere!!! I assume the main Run might have started at 11:00, but hey, who cares??? Except for a blind bloke running by himself having started at the same time as my daughter, my daughter and my grandson were passed by no one and won the wheelchair event with only this blind bloke way in front!!!!

                They were told that there was a presentation about 90 minutes later so besides having to wait 45 minutes freezing her tits off for the start, she was expected to hang about with her son for another age and a bit. And him needing a feed. I don't think so after all we are talking about a disable child here, are we not?

               Oh yes, and they won a cup which was promised in a day or so .... or 10 or 20????

             For an organising company which may have been employed by the Rotary to run the event, I may be wrong Blog, but it leaves a little to be desired. Do you want to buy my shares in the Company, Blog??? Yours at a discount!!!

                                Colin

as back matey boy

Dear Blog,
                 The sad news is that a long lost uncle has died.
                 The good news is that he has left me a stack of postage stamps in his will, so I can start writing to you again blog.
                                                     Colin