Midland Track League, Coventry. Sunday June 9th 2013 results

Dear Blog,

     Do you like my latest garden installation? It is my touching tribute to Ballcock and Brown, those two innovative avators who were the first to fly by aeroplane across the English Channel. I have installed in on the washing line temporarily to instil into it the feeling of freedom caused by free flight, a sort of Ryan Air experience without Ryan.

    On Sunday, I helped out in the pleasant weather at the Midland Senior Track League at the Coventry Track at the University of Wawick although the sun was in out all afternoon. Today, the gloom merchants on the radio (a picture less television Blog!) warned of unpleasant weather … by which they meant that it was going to rain. Question => why is it unpleasant if it is going to rain??? Obviously the forecaster has never washed her hair in rain water. If she had she would not make such fatuous comments, nor would she spend most of the money she obtains from the weather service on hair shampoo and hair conditioner and hiar this and heir that and here today and gone tomorrow. Did you know Blog, that some of the great swathes of houses in Coventry built between the wars still have the rain water tanks on the roofs (!!! That what the man says!!!) of their out houses and a few even still have three taps; besides the usual hot and cold water taps they have a third one which is connected to the rain water tank. Having just struggled back from my wet trudge and combed my fast disappearing locks, the effect caused by the rain is all too apparent; smooth and silky like a baby’s bottom. [In this day and age I suppose that THAT COMMENT is not P.C.? Better be careful or a P.C. will be calling.]

  While I was out I noticed that the grass verges were uncut, the weight of the rain forcing the long grass to lean over into the road way. In previous years we have had the council mowers down the lane at the bottom of the estate driveways, a couple of times already. This year, not a single blade I have I spotted severed anywhere in Coventry. A cost cutting exercise by not cutting grass, methinks Geeves? Perhaps the Council are repeating their money raising gimmick of the 1970s when council finances were also tight as they appear to be at present. What did they do, you ask Blog? I am glad you asked me that Blog. Well I will tell you again Blog …. They neither cut the grass verges nor did they cut the school playing fields or the grass on the pitches in the parks or any of the other grass in the parks of the city. They let it grow all summer … and grow it did!!! Then what did the council then do??? I am glad you asked me that Blog. Well I will tell you. They put the grass cutting out to tender and sold the hay to the highest bidder. So the farmers moved in and mowed the grass and the missing tennis balls and the odd child that had been lost in the long parkland grass. And they left the mown hay to dry. And the children moved in and played lots of new games invented especially for the use of mown hay. And the more adventurous older children discovered that dry mown grass burnt rather well!! And the doggie walkers found that the doggies loved to do what doggies do in mown hay and they doggie dodood. All in that newly mown drying hay. And the farmers returned to bale their hay which they had paid the council many quids for but found that the cattle did not like the charred remains nor did the cattle like the doggie dodood hay and the farmers were upset having paid the council lots of quids for the cattle feed which the cattle did not like to feed on and the farmers had to buy hay from elsewhere where it had not been either burnt or doggie popood. And when the footballers started to football a few weeks later they too were upset because they had bald pitches because the grass had not regrown since the farmers had baled the hay. And the council had to try to reseed the pitches for the up-coming season and the council had left it too late to reseed and a winter football season was spent playing mudball.

      And for us that liked to trudge, the summer was most difficult, because it was impossible to run around any of the parks in Coventry or to use any of the school playing fields because the grass had grown far too long. And what narrow paths had been worn down by the doggie walkers walking their doggies were occupied by doggie walkers walking their doggies and the grass at the path sides was too long for the trudgers to trudge passed.

    And the council’s brilliant idea of getting someone else to cut the grass and get them to pay the council for the privilege backfired and many quids had to be paid in compensation to disgruntled farmers and many quids had to be paid to try to make the pitches playable and no one was held responsible for this very clever idea.

    But the interesting question now arises …. Is history about to repeat itself??? Does anyone from the council remember this fiasco from many years ago when my trudge was faster than a jog??? And will the council try it again or just let the grass on the verges rot? And when the verges have rotted, nature will creep onto the tarmac and start a process of deterioration which the frosts and snows of next winter will complete …. BUT. ALL IS NOT LOST. Thanks be to God, that the Coventry Half Marathon has been moved by the council to March because the Council can use the income generated from the entrance fees from the joggers in the Half Marathon to repair the roads in the interests of Health and Safety. Now Blog, is that clever with a capital ‘C’ or is that clever with a capital ‘C’??

                           Colin

Chick, chick, chicken.

The last view I saw before I fed the chickens.

Question Blog … Have you ever seen a chicken run? No I don’t mean one of those wooden buildings where the chickens lay their eggs. And I don’t mean ‘Chicken Run’ the animation film of the year 2000. I actually mean, literally, have you seen a chicken run, as in a chicken putting one leg in front of the other to cover as much ground as possible in the shortest possible time. A fast trudge if you like. Gotme? Good. Right. Well they do look funny in their ungainly gait but they can run quickly. Amazing quickly when food is the incentive!

  And so it came to pass a week ago yesterday, I was sat in my daughters camper van parked in the farmer’s field where we staying for the week with all other campers long since gone home after the Bank Holiday break. The adjacent field contained a couple of chicken runs (the wooden type!), some rare sheep breed and a few geese. The van’s side sliding door was wide open and I was admiring the Derbyshire Peaks while I munched on my lunchtime sandwiches. At peace with the world I was Blog. You’re actual contented camper! I was watching the chickens peck away contentedly about 100 yards away (90 metres to you Blog). I was thinking how slow my trudge is these days and wondered how to make the chickens run fast. Juxta thoughts? Now it must have been the power of this subliminal thought process because the chickens were soon in full flight except that they weren’t in full flight per sec, i.e. wings flapping flipping fast; they were running fast. And what caused this sudden spurt you ask Blog. I am glad you asked that question. As I said I was quietly munching on my sandwich which my dear wife of 42 years and two days had prepared for my luncheon when I suddenly felt sick. Very sick. Violently sick. I just a made it to the van door and I was violently sick with an impressive series of projection vomits. I managed to shoot out of the van, through the open doorway to the grass outside and there I performed. A performance of Oscar proportions. The speed of movement would have had Tyson and Usain green with envy. As green as the grass. As green as I was! The first projected sick vomit had barely hit the ground before the first chicken skidded to a halt at my feet, leading a phalanx of another dozen. Their speed over the ground was impressive, easily breaking evens, and not even waiting to catch their breath as they clucked into my sick. The sound of hens in paroxysms of pleasure as they frenziedly devoured my wife’s sandwiches; it was pleasure to see them enjoying their food; my food. As the next of my dear wife’s sandwiches arched into the air, their clucking reached a crescendo of clacking. Share and share alike I always say. They almost finished their surprise meal before I did. With the prospect of no immediate half-digested tit bits arriving soon, the consensus of opinion was to stick around in case there was more sick around a little later. Give the boy a break. Give him time to think. They decided that I was a good future bet for a meal out and wouldn’t leave my heels. I walked to the toilet block to clean myself up. The flock of hens followed. I walked back to the van. The hens followed. I went for a little walk around the field to clear my head. The chickens came along too. A bleeding Pied Piper I was without me pipe and no sign of any rat. Who needs a rat when you have yourown personal private flock of chucks? The cockerel came over to find out what my attraction was and I heard the chicks telling him that they had just been out for a meal; they told him it was a sickin in a basket. Or it sounded something like that.

   Having missed out on a free meal, this next morning as dawn broke, so did the cock outside the van. A series of very loud continuous cock a doodle doo which went on and on and on got me up before the sun was up! Obviously getting his own back for not having received a formal invitation to the free meal out the day before! Very peeved he seemed when I chased him. He was none too happy with the chopper I was carrying either.

                Colin

P.S. Spent the day in Sheffield library … ,more next time Blog.



Tips for a happy marriage.

Dear Blog,

    During the course of my sojourn in the Peak National Park last week, it was my wife’s 42^nd wedding anniversary. And it was no coincidence that it was my 42^nd wedding anniversary as well. They say that things come along in twos, don’t they? Well I thought I would treat her. We stayed about half a mile away from the small Derbyshire village of Edale where there is a single shop, a pub and a small hotel. She had been cooking all week, cooped up in the camper van, so I asked her as an anniversary treat if she would like to eat out for a change. You should have seen the look of sheer delight on her face. The smile shone through her wrinkles. Heart tugging to see, it was. I gave her a little peck on the cheek and said I was popping into the village to arrange the meal out. Luckily the village shop was still open so I was able to purchase a portable bar-b-q for £2 and a packet of sausages. She was so taken aback when I arrived back at the van with my anniversary gifts. I must say that it was a little chilly sat outside the van while the sausages sizzled away in the pan, but I promised a meal out, and being a man of my word, I stuck out the discomfort by wearing a couple of jumpers, my thick jacket, my scarf and long johns under my trousers. Eating mt sausage sandwich with my gloves on was not easy. No one else on the site seemed to want to enjoy the fresh air.

  Next day, as we trudged through the village to climb up onto the Dark Peak plateau for our walk, we passed the village church where they were having a car boot sale to raise funds for the repair of the church roof. I suggested to my good wife of 42 years and one day that we pop in and have a look round. She had been dropping hints for some weeks that she would like something for the garden by way of a 42^nd wedding anniversary present. Now I am not an ungenerous man and had been giving a great deal of thought about what I could buy her; something which would last, something which would remind her of our time, our long time, our long, long time together. And there it was. On the second stall. The ideal present. THE anniversary present for my dear wife. I had to haggle with the stall holder for some time but eventually I got the price down to what I though was a reasonable price, not that I would have skimped. It was an anniversary present when all was said and done. He had wanted £1:50 but we finally settled on £1:00. A lawn mower. A hand push grass mower. I said to my wife that I would allow her to use some of my machine oil to lubricate the wheels as they appeared to be rather stiff and dragged when you tried to push the machine along. And I said I would show her how to use my metal file to sharpen the blades. As reassurance, I said that it should only take an hour or so to do all the rotary blades if she worked fairly hard at the task.

  Now Blog, did you spot my mistake in buying the mower for a bargain price of £1:00. Yes, well done. As I said, it was the start of our climb up onto the Dark Peak plateau for our walk. I think it is fair comment to say that she really did struggle on some of the steeper sections during our eleven miles trudge. If I had had the machine oil with me and could have lubricated the mower before we set off, it would have been a great deal easier for my wife. But then, I cannot anticipate everything. After a couple of miles over the heathland and heather, I did suggest to my dear wife that she might find it a little easier if she dragged the mower behind her rather than pushing it along. I think she whimpered a little note of thanks for the advice.

    To look on the bright side. Although I thought it unfortunate at the time of purchase, the mower didn’t have a grass box, but as I said to my dear wife, raking the grass clippings up every time she cut the lawn would be excellent exercise at her age. As we climbed up to Kinder Scout, I had a little joke with her to cheer her up; it was the day after our anniversary after all. I said that it was funny how things turn out some times, how a dark cloud can have a silver lining. I said that if the mower had had a grass box, she would have had to continually to stop to empty it as the cotton grass and heather was rather thick in places. She sort of whimpered. Just then it started to rain.

                     Colin

P.S. I have been thinking about what I said yesterday concerning the Coventry Half Marathon and the press release from the Council … if the council claim that it costs £50,000 to put the marathon on, and the income from the entrants, at say £25 a throw, this gives another £50,000 and raises the question => Does that mean that the council flash out £100,000 to promote the race or to do the sums a different way, does it cost Nowt with a capital ‘N’ to promote the race?? It would be interested to see some figures. Oh look up Blog, a flying pig.

Coventry Half Marathon 23rd March 2014

Photograph Quiz:

Photo no: Sorry Blog, I haven’t a clue. Look in your letter box and let me know! Did I really stop in this on my visit to Edale. A most interesting railway carriage, I have to confess.

Dear Blog,

        Sorry for the long silence but I have been on my holidays and there was not a lot of communication facilities there. I went to the Edale Valley and radio / T.V / etc. reception just doesn’t happen!!! Blog, I would not lie to you.

        I have had a note during my absence about the Coventry Half Marathon. Well, apparently it isn’t. Isn’t going to happen this year. It has been switched to March 23^rd 2014. Now this is interesting … the council got into bed with a commercial organisation Big-something or other, presumably thinking that they knew what they were doing. It was a two year contract – two races as it turned out costing the council £5000 which is nearly £30 per competitor who actually paid a similar amount in entry fees to have a gallop round. And if you refer back to the letters I wrote to you at the time, the organisation and the deliverance, left a great deal to be desired. A great deal, with a capital ‘G’ and ‘D’. I do not know if it was a councillor or a local government employee who was suckered, but were they conned???? And of course the local rag always puts a gloss on these things ‘hundreds took part’ when a couple of dozen turn up for some event, ‘thousands took part’ when a couple of hundred turn up for some function. It is all kidology, conveying the feel-good factor. Part of the duty of today’s press???? So both races were a resounding success in black and white whereas in reality, a lot was left to be desired. A lot with a capital ‘L’.

     Now the interesting question is who will be the next company and will the person doing the appointing have the slightest inkling of what half marathon running is all about??? Or what the competitors want?? Where will the course be?? How close to a half-marathon will the distance be??? Will enough t-shirts be ordered for all the competitors??? Will the runners be sent wrong??? Will the marshals turn up to man the junctions???

   Now is the time to hold your breath Blog and watch this space????

                                Colin

I'm so sorry, So so sorry, I'm sorry I led you astray, tiddly bum bum, tiddly bum ...

Dear Blog,

          Sorry, sorry, sorry!!! I am big enough to admit that occasionally, very occasionally I make a mistake. It has been known to happen but I must admit that I cannot recall when. So. Yesterday, I sent you a picture in the Photograph Quiz of the wrong pub – clearly a case of one too many??? No wonder you could not answer the question!!!! The pub picture I sent you was at number 152, the one I should have sent is at number 4 on the city side of the railway bridge you can see in the photograph …. Now to untangle. All the questions still apply except that there is a now a DOUBLE connection to Godiva. A clue for you Blog => mid 1920s and early 1970s, think publican, think runner, think Godiva Harrier!!!! And there is still that ‘snickers’ to play for remember!!

                                                     Colin 
   
P.S. And who was Mrs. So Sorry?????? 

Colin can you hepl? Yes I can, yes I can.

Photograph Quiz:

Photo no. 145:- Read the caption Blog. What is the connection to Godiva?

What is the connection to this pub on the left? And amazingly, what is the connection to the Olympic Games Marathon.? 

And if you get that lot correct Blog, I will reward you with a Snickers Bar!!!!!

    

Well Blog, This morning refreshed by the old morning trudge around the block and with the threat of rather bad weather during the course of the day making the Estate administrative chores like weeding, weeding and cutting the grass a pleasure to be avoided even more, I settled down to a day of structuring the way I will set up display for the National Heritage Weekend in the Godiva clubhouse, featuring ‘The History of Coventry Godiva Harriers and Other Clubs in the City during the last 140 years’. This is hard to believe, b ut would I lie to you Blog? I posted my last little message to you less than 72 hours ago  …. Now I don’t know who you know Blog, but I am impressed with a capital ‘I’. During the time between my licking the stamp on the letter to you the day before yesterday and my coffee break at 9:30 am this morning, I had enquiries about two ‘Godiva Athletes’ of yesteryear and three scrap books of Godiva members who I had not seen for years and years!!!! Co-incidence? Pre-ordination? Chance? The work of the Devil? Or you Blog, you little tease?

     One of the enquiries was most interesting, I must confess. Yes I had information about the father …. probably about the grandfather which was a surprise to the enquirer that his grandfather ran. Then about his great grandfather who also ran for Godiva and about whom he knew completely nothing. Zilch!!! Reminds me of a similar scenario about a decade ago when I was able to reveal a new uncle, a grandfather, and the exploits of the father as a starter and as a renown cyclist of considerable standing; all of which came as a complete surprise to that enquirer. Makes getting up for an early morning trudge that more worthwhile, methinks.

                                                     Colin

National Heritage Weekend, September 2013

Dear Blog,

               I wrote to you some time ago mentioning that about a decade ago, I put on a display for the Godiva Festival. The Festival takes the form of a very impressive parade through the streets of Coventry (worth visiting Blog) which terminates in the Coventry War Memorial Park where there is a Fun Fair and a free two day music event with two or three different stages. Also included are several tents, one dealing with comedy, one for children and also a ‘History Tent’ for any organisation with an historical perspective to exhibit. I put on a display about the ‘History of Coventry Godiva Harriers’ since it’s foundation in 1879. I won first prize as Best Display!!

              I wanted to repeat the exercise this year, but expand to include other Clubs in the City and change the focus onto the root causes as to why Godiva survived when many other clubs around the country foundered. As I required a large amount of space because of the way I wanted to do the presentation, it was not convenient to take part. I refocused onto the National Heritage Weekend in September and now hope to stage a display in the Coventry Godiva Clubhouse on the Warwick University Campus …. So come along Blog!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 .........

             If an athlete is found guilty of a drugs offence, he / she is banned for a time period with the very real fears that when the athlete has served the time ban and returns to competition, there is still a residual effect remaining in the body which will continue to give a competitive advantage. The person / coach supplying the offending substance really is named and similarly is very really banned or taken to a court of law for breaking the rules of the sport. Now think Blog. We are having an on-going investigation into the Godolphin Stables of horse racing where many horses have tested positive for a banned drug. It is the trainer who supplied the drugs to the horses who is banned leaving the horses free to carry on with the possibility that there is still a residual effect remaining in the body which will continue give a competitive advantage to the guilty horses.  Ney, this can’t be right? Are four legs better than two, I ask?

                                                                              Colin