So Blog, after spending some time under a tin roof you might want to ask me what I have learned from the experience. I am glad you asked that question Blog for I shall tell you. Firstly it is highly improbably that I will cut my head open on the roof of a tent. Secondly it is highly improbable that I will cut my head open twice by bumping into the soft canvas roof of a back packing tent and what is even more improbable, the chances of cutting my head open three times on the roof of a tent is as probable as that nice Mr Cameroon voting for a labour government at the next election. But as it is a secret ballot, we will never know, will we? So with a badly damaged skull and lots of blood, I feel that camping in a tent and not camper vanning is the way forward for me. It is that or the designers of camper vans need to take into consideration that the aged population of this country who enjoy the great outdoor experience do not always look where they are going or are fully aware of low cupboards suspended from ceilings in the confined space of a van. My bicycle went with me to watch the Wrexham Half Marathon at the weekend, and after the numerous head bumps, I took to wearing my cycling helmet indoors … but with the swelling from the three impacts, it proved a little tight on my head.
Secondly, in a tent it is easy to take to the sleeping bag at an early hour because stretched out along one side of a tent causes no trouble to anyone. Likewise if the previous night’s liquid refreshments prove a little difficult to contain in the many hours before dawn, it is only the sound of the zip which disturbs the whole camp site, falling liquid on grass being a fairly quiet impact. Not so in a campervan … any movement from a made up bunk requires the cooperation of all fellow residents, so an early night is completely out of the question. Agreed bedtime is the order of the evening. And if the previous night’s liquid refreshments prove a little difficult to contain in the many hours before dawn, it is noise of the others in the van complaining at being disturbed and the sound of the door of the van slamming shut which disturbs the whole camp site; in this situation the sound of falling liquid splashing onto concrete is surprisingly noisy in the dead of night. And the liquid splashing onto pyjama bottoms is not very pleasant; it takes ages to dry off when the return to the sleeping bag is made (to say nothing of damp ankles and wet toes). The sound of the door of the van crashing shut, again disturbs the whole camp site assuming they have been able to nod off to the soothing sound of running water and again it is the noise of the others in the van complaining at being disturbed by a returning resident which does absolutely nothing for the beauty sleep of other van campers.
So what else … well the Wrexham Half Marathon was well organised by the local athletic club with none of the fuss and bother of the usual large field races organised by commercial interests. Not a chip in sight and still the results were available quickly. No road closure for 13 plus miles and no traffic problems, the junctions all being manned efficiently by the organising club members or the Air Training Corp. Very many photographs of all runners are available gratis … none of this big city gisthequidsforyourmugshot business. And instead of a silly little finisher’s medal dangling on a bit of coloured ribbon, all participants ended up with a loaf of malt bread. 11 out of 10 for Wrexham Athletic Club, says I. And my younger daughter ran O.K..
And Blog, if you are ever up that way and want a trudge, or just a nice walk in the woods, try Nesscliffe Country Park … the sheer cliff size is most unexpected, and I do mean sheeeer Blog, with a capital ‘S’. And the pub in Nesscliffe village, The Three Pigeons, is not to be missed for a meal. None of your thawed frozen pre-packed rubbish there … proper food lad, proper food.
The biggest disappointment though … on the way back down the motorway, it was a little upsetting to see that the two blokes I told you about in my last letter had done nothing to the cones on the southbound carriageway of the M6. They were noticeably muckier than those on the northbound side. Still they have plenty of time left to complete their task I suppose.
And while I am on the subject of traffic cones, what is all this business of green cones all about? And what about the yellow ones too? Have I missed something or what??? Let me know Blog, please.
Colin
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